A Shift in Perspective
Fun (fŭn) n. A source of enjoyment or pleasure; amusing diversion (e.g. Being stuck at a desk days on end is fun. Have fun drowning in reports! Being overworked and underappreciated heightened the fun for me).
Not. In. My. Dictionary. Ever.
The phone ringing on my desk was no competition for the excitement of the radio squawk. Put me in, Sarge, I’m ready to play! No go; this patrol officer was on light duty picking up the phone and pushing through countless reports for minor crimes. My handcuffs were in my duty belt, but they might as well have had me chained to my desk.
A two-tone alert would go out over the radio and my adrenaline would surge with the blaring sirens of the responding units who were on their way to deal with shoplifters, fights, medical emergencies, crashes, and homicides. I wished I could be out there with them, helping whomever was in need. With bated breath, I would wait for dispatch and the officers on scene to give updates over the air regarding the cases they were on. Then the phone would ring and I was back in the reality of writing yet another petty report.
As I treaded water in the sea of the mundane, an occasional life preserver would come my way. I put together a comprehensive and detailed report on a fraud case and the level of work gave me great satisfaction. A theft case landed on my desk and stringing the clues together that led to an arrest was thrilling. But these instances were rare. Most of the time, it seemed that the effort and detail I put into my reports wasn’t worth it as most of the cases either hit a dead end or weren’t considered worth further pursuit due to lack of additional evidence, etc.
Looking back on that time, it tends to bring to the surface of my memories feelings of frustration and lack of appreciation for the work I did. However, I have recently been learning that while I can’t change the circumstances of what happened, I can choose to change my perspective of that time and by doing so, re-wire my brain to recall those memories with positive emotions instead of negative ones.
I can choose to be grateful for the opportunity I had to improve my verbal and written communication skills with all of the calls I took on the telephone and the report writing that I did. Instead of begrudging officers on the street who refused to help me out when I was swamped with calls, I can choose to be grateful that I could help them out by taking the petty reports so that they were free to respond to more pressing calls for service and have the time for officer-initiated investigations. By reflecting back on that time with a heart of gratitude instead of frustration, I begin to shift my perspective of those events and can start to recall those memories with positive emotions in place of the negative ones. It is a process as it literally takes time for these things to re-wire in my brain. But, the more I practice the habit of recalling these circumstances with gratitude, the more frequently I am able to shift my perspective to a positive one.
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